Just A Few Thoughts...

I Left a Piece of My Heart in Japan

2012-01-15T07:56:00.003-06:00

I have written this blog many times in my head but I have not had the resolve to put it in writing until just recently. On 11 March 2011, Japan experienced their most catastrophic earthquake measuring 9.3 magnitude and experienced a resulting tsunami, which affected many parts of northeastern Japan. Left in the tsunami’s wake was a devastated landscape of splintered homes, decomposing bodies, twisted vehicles and a damaged nuclear power plant. Immediately following the large quake were several strong aftershocks. Everywhere buildings shook violently and everyone was on edge throughout the night and for many weeks to come.

For me, that day started out like any other ordinary Friday at work, but it quickly metamorphosed into an unforgettable day of tragedy and horror. The quake struck at approximately 2:45 pm at Camp Zama. Many of us were in our offices conducting business as usual when the walls started to shake. The walls were vibrating, the building was making sounds, and some of the employees were running out of the building screaming. Needless to say, I followed. I had never been through an earthquake so I really did not know what was happening at first but if the locals were concerned, I was going to do whatever they did. The earth kept moving for at least 3-5 minutes and we kept getting aftershocks in the 6-7 magnitude throughout the evening.

In the ensuing hours, many of you watched in horror the devastation as the story unfolded on all the news channels. To be honest, Camp Zama was insulated from any real damage but the reverberations of the aftermath caused many issues to arise. Immediately our management team and staff kicked into emergency mode to ensure 100% employee and family accountability across the country of Japan. This was initially difficult because all communication lines were down except for an occasional cell phone in which people communicated via Facebook or Twitter. I immediately called my husband to let him know I was well and that the images he was watching on TV were not what I was experiencing on Camp Zama.

The days that followed seemed to bleed into another and it all seemed like a bad dream as reports of the damaged Fukushima nuclear plant began to unfold. The dream seemed never ending because we were experiencing aftershocks daily and I even had to take Dramamine because I was experiencing motion sickness. I never turned the TV off and packed my suitcases in case I was required to evacuate at a moments notice. There was a growing concern from some that the Japanese government was not telling the truth about just how bad the damage was. To further complicate matters, the US government began “voluntary departure” orders for specialized groups of people and it caused some panic and hysteria for those that did not immediately qualify under those orders. Many things quickly ramped up that were “Neo” like and some US citizens were evacuated off the island. The rest of us left behind continued to focus on our mission and tried to conduct business as usual but this again was further complicated by conflicting reports of radiation contamination in the air, food, and water supply. My personal lowest point was on a morning that I learned the base well water supply had detected contamination and we were advised to only drink bottled water…I had just brushed my teeth! That same week all US citizens were issued potassium iodide (KI) pills. KI pills were intended to be a “just in case” measure and were issued to prevent the thyroid from absorbing radiation in the event our radiation exposure levels spiked. I had to report to the gym on base, hear a safety briefing from the medical command, sign for the 7-day supply and return to work. Thank goodness, we actually never had to ingest the KI pills but having them in my possession caused some distress if I thought about it too much. I personally performed better when I kept my mind and thoughts focused on the mission rather than the possible catastrophic events that could occur. Everyone reacts to situations differently and I discovered that I was a stronger person than I thought I was and I found that I could keep my cool in an emergency.

Here we are almost a year later and I still think about the unbelievable amount of concern, love and support shown from a network of friends, co-workers and family that kept in touch with me daily bolstering my morale during my stay in Japan. I bonded with many of my immediate co-workers on a level that I feel I will never experience again. My supervisory chain showed incredible leadership and calm during the crisis and their concern for our employees impressed me. Although news of Japan's tsunami and earthquake has faded on the news channels, my heart and fondness for the Japanese people is forever etched in my memory…it is a memory filled with love and compassion not just devastation.

The Pain and Pleasure of a Bathhouse Experience

2012-01-02T09:58:00.000-06:00

For my first blog of the New Year, I decided to look back over my previous emails, blogs, and notes from 2011. I found this recollection on my bathhouse experience in Japan that I thought you would enjoy reading. The irony of the experience is too good to not share!

OMG, today was a very interesting experience at the bathhouse with my friend Patty. I was terrified initially to go to the bathhouse, but I am glad I went. I am such a germ phoebe and had many stereotypical ideas what it would be like…none of which were true. The bathhouse was segregated (men on one side of the building with a wall between and women on the other), but it was full on nudity throughout the visit. The Japanese people take their bathhouse experience very seriously. There were three soaking pools in the outdoor area, and four indoors. Each pool had a different temperature degree, jet speed, and water “flavor”. I would have been lost and made hundreds of social blunders without my friend Patty interpreting the whole process. There was an entire ritual of taking off my shoes, putting them in the locker, getting a bag of towels, paying for my services through a vending machine (people don’t touch money much), giving my ticket to the appointment taker, confirming my appointment for which service I wanted in addition to the soaking (i.e. scrub, massage, etc.), getting undressed, showering, and which towel to use. I chose the full body scrub, oil and massage for $6K Yen. OMG it was an experience!

I was told to soak for at least 30 minutes before my scrub so that my skin would be softer…which I did. Then I went into a small room and lay on a table (nude). There was a very small Korean woman that covered my face with a hot towel and wrapped my hair up in a towel. I am small in size, but this woman was half the size of me. She had on both of her hands what appeared to be “rough socks”. I really did not have a clue what the actual fabric was but it felt like sand paper. OMG it did hurt but I kept telling myself “no one ever died from this, so get through it!” The woman scrubbed EVERY inch of my entire body including every fold and crease except for the two areas with “hair” (head and you know where else). Now again, let me remind you….when I say scrub, she scrubbed very vigorously and it hurt but it oddly also felt pleasurable when she finally stopped and my skin was tingling. Later, she poured hot oily water all over my raw body, which again hurt, but not for long. Then she proceeded to oil me more and then gave a vigorous massage all over my body again. I have had massages before, but this one was the best by far. Somewhere during all of this, I finally forgot that I was a germ phoebe and just tried to “enjoy” the experience.

As an addendum to this email, I have to disclose that two days after the bathhouse experience, I had to go to sick call on base in Japan for an allergic reaction. I had always known I was allergic to sulfa, but little did I know that the pools that I had soaked in for hours were loaded with natural volcanic sulfates! Needless to say, I never went back and repeated my bathhouse experience, but it was an experience I will never forget—both good and bad!

Duty, Honor, Country, Valor, Sacrifice, and Heroism

2011-11-11T09:32:00.000-06:00

Today and every day, I raise my American flag proudly and think about the sacrifices that our men and women have made and are still making in Iraq, Afghanistan and in places which we don't even think about to keep our great country free. We, as a free Nation, should be ever grateful for our veterans—those past and present. I am a proud American because it honors the brave men and women who have served our country and given so much. Their service is such a noble sacrifice that, in my opinion, demands our sincerest respect, thanks, and admiration.

One Person - One Opinion

2011-10-30T15:26:00.001-05:00

I just got back from eleven days of work related travel to Portland, Oregon. On three separate occasions, I walked a few blocks from my downtown hotel to visit the Occupy Portland protest site located opposite Portland’s City Hall in Chapman and Lownsdale Square parks. This “tent city" was made up of approximately 200-400 tents that in my opinion, contained a group of a rag tag people appearing to only be interested in anarchy and publicity. Many of them appeared to be there because they were homeless, fighting addiction, or just wanted to be a part of something. The site had a pungent odor and there were several self-crafted poster board signs littering the parks and sidewalks. The damage to the parks appeared to be inconsistent with the “peace, love, and happiness” goals of the movement.

Occupy Portland started October 6 and grew out of the nationwide anit-Wall Street movement that is occurring across America. It is my understanding that the Wall Street movement began with the premise that everyday working people were fed up with policies that protected the financial markets and were generally angry over an unfair economic system and the disappearing middle class. If Occupy Portland’s movement is going to have any impact, besides complaining about the inequities in our society, the protesters need sit down and come up with a platform of issues and an agenda to accomplish them. Their complaints cannot just be vague pleas to end injustice. They need to be part of the solution and not just part of the problem. I do not think anything will be gained from Occupy Portland’s movement and it certainly will not help the protesters resume if they are trying to get a job.

Many people think that these protests are great, but where do we go from here? I believe in the right to free speech and the ability to peacefully protest. However, this crowd in Portland is walking a tightrope of civil disobedience that is not abiding by laws and ordinances and they are being destructive to public property. Thousands of dollars in officer overtime pay, park restoration, and sanitation removal, is needed to sustain this occupation—and who is paying for this? You are the taxpayer. I think that in this tough economic time, our tax dollars could be better spent elsewhere.

Remembering Sept. 11, 2001

2011-09-10T21:13:00.000-05:00

This is my 50th post on this blog and I wish to honor those that died on September 11, 2001. Here we are once again, on the anniversary of the most important world-changing event—9/11. Like other crucial historical dates, most people remember exactly where they were and what they were doing on that date. I remember September 11, 2001 very well. It was a beautiful sunny day and I was at work at Philips Semiconductors in San Antonio, Texas. My husband called and said that a TV station reported that a small plane crashed into the North Tower of the World Trade Center. I stepped into the break room and saw that everybody had their eyes glued to the TV and they were expressing many levels of sadness. My attention was immediately drawn to the image of the burning North Tower. As I stood there in shock, I saw another plane fly into the South Tower. It was at that moment, I knew what was happening was not an accident and I think I said aloud, “We’re being attacked!”

As horror gripped us all that morning, watching the events unfold on TV, I knew that September 11, 2001 had become a day to remember. All of us stood there watching images of the tens of thousands fleeing the dust clouds pouring through the streets of New York and we witnessed the deaths of approximately 3,000 people that day. The images that still haunt me are the ones of the people jumping to their death. They stood in the windows of the Towers, desperately breathing in the air and with an inferno raging ever closer knowing that they would die if they stayed. Finally, with no options left, they hurled themselves out into space. As the days passed, I could not sleep and I stayed in front of the TV watching those images repeatedly.

For all those who remember, who continue to bear the scars and to the memories of all who were lost on that tragic day in New York City, Pennsylvania, and at the Pentagon — Godspeed. Know that I will never forget you.

It's Been A Long Time

2011-09-10T16:18:00.001-05:00

Hello to all my fellow bloggers, Facebook friends and family! I am sorry for not updating my blog in such a long time. I suppose you could say I am at a crossroads of sorts as to whether to continue with my blog. Since I came back from

Japan

in June, I felt I had a lot to share but I did not know where to start. Visiting

Japan

was one of the best things that I have done and I have no regrets. I am still trying to sort out my feelings regarding the 9.3 earthquake, living on Camp Zama and the many friendships that I made along the way. I left a piece of my heart in

Japan

and I will always cherish the memories of my visit. I am sure as time passes, I will be able to write about my experiences but for now, I am still holding those memories close.

In the beginning, I started writing this blog as a form of release to help me articulate many thoughts that I have swimming around in my head. Some of these thoughts have been bottled up for a long time and just like pouring wine from a bottle; they do not come out all at once. I know that sometimes my postings may seem disjointed and random but they are the outpourings of my mind and they are connected to me and what I am feeling, seeing, or doing at any given time. Several people have stopped by to read my blog and even some people have commented on my posts. I sincerely thank all of you for taking the time to read my thoughts and thank you for expressing words of kindness and showing some understanding. I often am asked why I write and my only answer is that it is my life, this is my story, and it is my choice to write about it because it brings me a sense of calm. I am learning to live, speak and write about my life in a positive way and hope that it will inspire others to do the same.

Sowing Seeds of Happiness

2011-02-20T05:44:00.000-06:00

I believe that we should intentionally choose daily habits or “disciplines” that will take us where we want to go in life. Each statement below stands for a pattern or habit that I want in my life. Some of the statements get more focus or effort than others, but over the years, they all have become the habits that help me create the life I want for myself.

1. Smile more, let yourself be happy and avoid negative people when possible.
2. Ask not what others can do for you, but what you can do for them.
3. Forgive others, forgive yourself, and learn from every mistake.
4. Always focus on self-improvement but keep it simple.
5. Live your life with passion, enthusiasm and purpose.
6. Be there for others, you could be someone’s hero.
7. Live in the moment and be grateful for it.
8. Do not put things off and never give up.
9. Always give more than you promise.

What do you want your life to look like? If you do not like how life is responding to you, you may need to look in the mirror. It is not about other people changing; it is often about you changing. I encourage you to choose a few simple, positive habits that will enhance your life. Reduce them to simple actions that you will be able to perform every day. It has often been said, “You reap what you sow”. So, get out there and plant a seed, you will get back more than one seed, you will get back thousands!

My Trip to Japan

2011-01-23T09:32:00.003-06:00

I love my job! For those of you that do not know where I work, I work for the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers, (USACE) Learning Center (ULC) located in Huntsville, Alabama as an Instructional Systems Specialist. Our organization is responsible for developing and presenting Proponent-Sponsored Engineer Corps Training (PROSPECT) classes needed to accomplish the Corps' Vision. We are part of the USACE family that is currently commanded by Lieutenant General Robert L. Van Antwerp. USACE around the world has approximately 34,600 Civilian and 650 military members. We employ military and civilian engineers, scientists and other specialists that work as leaders in the engineering and environmental arena. We have a diverse workforce of biologists, engineers, geologists, hydrologists, natural resource managers and other professionals that meet the demands of changing times and requirements as a vital part of America's Army. We have offices around the globe to include places like Japan, Republic of Korea, Afghanistan, Iraq, and Europe. The offices contribute significantly to the peace and security of the regions that they are located in though the execution of multi-billion dollar construction programs.

Less than two weeks ago, I was invited by the Japan Engineer District (JED) Commander, Colonel Truesdell to go TDY for 120 days. His district is located on Camp Zama, Japan where I will provide backfill support for deployed personnel supporting the rebuild efforts in Afghanistan. It is both an honor and a privilege for me to be able to help and provide this kind of assistance. Joining the JED is an opportunity to make a lasting contribution to support the soldiers, sailors, airmen, marines and their families living and working in Japan. What an incredible opportunity for me both professionally and personally!

Camp Zama (キャンプ座間) is a U.S. Army post located approximately 35 miles southwest of Tokyo. The JED has a skilled workforce consisting of over 315 personnel including Japanese and U.S. citizens working together with the government of Japan. They are one of the largest of the 45 districts in the Corps that provides quality, professional and comprehensive engineering, construction, and other value-added services in support of peacetime and contingency operations around the world.

So, as you can imagine I have been quite busy with lots of things in preparation of my 13-hour flight to Japan. I have had to get five shots (I still cannot raise my arms above my head), take three online training modules, fill out countless pieces of paperwork, create orders, find my passport, finalize funding, and send lots of email to make my departure date of 31 January 2011. I appreciate all the helpful folks along the way that have helped make this trip possible (USACE HQ, JED, SAW, ULC, HNC, and the support of my husband). With a 13-hour time difference, I am not sure what my personal connectivity will be like but I am looking forward to keeping all of you informed through this blog, Facebook, Twitter and on Skype.

Statistical and source information: http://www.usace.army.mil/Pages/default.aspx

Happy New Year - Good Bye 2010 Blog

2010-12-27T20:26:00.000-06:00

I swear I am running out of steam with all the holidays galore. Whether you celebrated Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, or your own special holiday, December is a whirlwind of activity capped off with a final holiday called the New Year—after which brings us a brand spanking new set of 12 months. I don't think I am going to make any New Year's resolutions this year but I typically make continuous goals that I strive for yearlong. These goals are easy, like trying to be a better wife, friend, employee, and overall person. If you want to make changes in your life, you need to start right now with something that is not that hard to change. Here are a few goals that I plan to work on this year:

1. I will try to exercise more regularly.
2. I will try to get more sleep in the coming year because 3-4 hours a night is about to do me in.
3. I will try to drink more water. I think I need to break my McDonald’s Sweet Tea and Starbuck’s Sweetened Green Tea addiction.
4. I will try to recycle more and be mindful of my footprint on this Earth.
5. I hope to do writing/blogging that is more meaningful in 2011.
6. I plan to say, "I love you" or “I appreciate you” every day to those that matter.
7. I want to be a better person. That means I will be more open and more introspective. I will listen more, preach less and lead with smaller steps rather than huge leaps.
8. Lastly, I look forward to the New Year with promise and hope.

I hope when you take time to reflect back on the past 12 months as I have, you will find happy thoughts and pleasant memories. New Year's Day means to me that we all have a fresh start with our goals and resolutions. It means that we have more chances to do the things we have always wanted to do. It means yet another year to spend with our loved ones and our friends. I am wishing you all a safe and wonderful New Year. Happy New Year!

Santa is Coming!

2010-12-24T15:45:00.000-06:00

Hello girls and boys around the world. It is Christmas Eve and Santa is coming. In some places, there is only one more time to fall asleep until Christmas morning. That is right; it is only one more night before the most joyous day of the year is here!

Santa is very lucky because he gets to see many wonderful things as he travels the whole world. He also gets to see many things that make him a little sad too. He sees people that are hungry, people that are hurting, and people that do not have a place to live. I am sure this year that he received many letters and emails from parents and children asking for more help. I am sure the letters and emails also expressed many feelings of thankfulness and hope. What gives Santa his energy and ability to serve the world is the hope and belief from all of us around the world.

Santa is really good at making toys and other Christmas presents, but he needs your help to make the world a better place. He needs all of us working on finding cures for diseases, stopping world hunger, and finding world peace. So, it is your turn to help Santa fulfill the wishes of all the girls and boys around the world.

I want to wish my readers and faithful supporters a Merry Christmas and happy New Year, filled with love, joy and happiness and my God bless you every day.

Christmas is forever, not for just one day,

for loving, sharing, giving, are not to put away

like bells and lights and tinsel, in some box upon a shelf.

The good you do for others is good you do yourself.

(Norman W. Brooks)

May you have the gladness of Christmas which is hope,

The spirit of Christmas which is peace;

The heart of Christmas which is love.

(Ada V. Hendricks)

"Old Age" is a Gift

2010-12-05T11:17:00.001-06:00

The other day a little boy asked me how I felt about being old. At first, I was taken aback because I do not think of myself as that old. Then I realized that it was an interesting question and I decided to ponder it and write this blog. It is my birthday on Monday and I am entering my 45th year on this planet!

To start with, I would never trade my friends, my life, or my family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I get older, I am finding it easier to be positive. I care less about what other people think. I do not question myself as much because I have earned the right to be wrong occasionally. I try not to reprimand myself for eating an extra cookie, for not making my bed, or for buying yet another pair of shoes that I did not need. I am entitled to treat myself, to be messy, and to be extravagant from time to time. I have seen far too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair sprinkled with gray and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.

Yes, sometimes I am forgetful. Then again, some of life is just as well forgotten, but eventually I do remember most of the important things! Sure, over the years my heart has been broken many times. Nevertheless, broken hearts are what give us strength, understanding, and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect. You see, as I have aged, I have tried to become kinder to myself and less critical at the same time. In reality, I have become my own friend.

I have decided that “old age” is a gift and I am now, probably for the first time in my life, on the verge of becoming the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body of course! I sometimes still anguish over my physical appearance - the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and yes, the saggy butt. Many mornings I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my parents), but I do not agonize over it very long. So, to answer that little boys question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I am becoming. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting on what could have been, or worrying about what will be.

The Splendor of Fall

2010-11-27T14:12:00.000-06:00

I woke up this morning in Nashville, TN and the thermostat read 28 degrees. The temperature change was a huge shift from the 70s that we had on Wednesday. Just a two-hour drive south to Huntsville, AL and the temperature is now hovering in the mid 50s. What a difference and what a lovely day today is turning out to be! The sun is shining, the air is so fresh and clean and I am warm and comfortable wearing a scarf and light jacket. I am now sipping on a cup of tea as the sun is shining enjoying this Saturday afternoon.

The large Maple tree outside my sunroom window has almost shed all of its leaves while others are still sporting the magnificent colors of Fall. As I look out, I am taking a snap shot with my mind and I almost wish I could freeze time to capture these beautiful moments, but then I realize that it is the change itself that makes it so beautiful. Without Nature’s constant change, everything would be the same and the beauty would become dull and lifeless. Much as in our lives, without change and reinvention the splendor would be gone. If we stop changing and improving ourselves, then we lose ourselves into a world of routine and monotony. Sometimes we need to let our leaves fall, knowing that they will reemerge all the more vibrant again. So as the leaves are falling, I am cherishing these moments as they come and go.

Self Awareness

2010-11-07T16:43:00.000-06:00

I believe we were put on this planet to master life. However, I know the only way to master life is to master ourselves first. Lately, I have had many days where I have felt tired and burned out and moments when I wanted to wave a white flag petitioning the powers that be for a brief respite. On some days, I felt as though I have lived an entire week in one day. These feelings have caused wear on my physical, mental and emotional being. This awareness has caused me to explore the need to be honest with myself, feeling the pull to connect to the truth, and feeling the need to step off the hamster wheel. I know who I am because acceptance is the key, honesty is my tool, and my feelings are my guides.

I believe that women are the most generous of givers. We live to give and give to live. This compulsion is often to the point of complete exhaustion. Lately, I have been wondering why I am compelled to give so much of myself freely. Through generosity and hard work, I try to give to all those around me – and do so without replenishing my own soul. Realizing this, I need to make myself a priority. Rather than standing in a space of critical and harsh self-judgment, I need to soften toward myself. I need to understand that each personality trait and every quality that resides within me serves a greater purpose. Although I may not be able to see it now, one day I will realize that every one of the qualities that I judged or labeled as wrong or bad is a blessing waiting to be realized. I also plan to give myself one small indulgence each day. For example, instead of running around meeting everyone else’s needs, I am going to take some time to sip my morning tea listening to the birds with my face upturned to the sun. I plan to breathe deeply and give myself the gift of stillness. I will also work on becoming a great receiver of all that I want in life instead of waiting for someone else to fulfill the need within me.

I have learned that I do not want to tip toe through life so that I can arrive safely at my death. There is an ominous stillness in the water between the waves and when we need to regroup. I need to remind myself to move into the still, peaceful waters behind the wave and lie on my back and look at the sky and rest. May we all find our place on the wave of life and ease onto it with grace.

Message to AED-North in Afghanistan

2010-10-10T08:39:00.002-05:00

I love Facebook, but it has limitations sometimes when I want to post on a wall. Here is a message I sent to a friend that is working in AED-North:

Each one of your video stories provides a remarkable volume and moving testimonial from the viewpoint of the ordinary person as well as the soldier on the ground doing their part to restore Afghanistan to its former glory. It gives a unique glimpse and perspective of the daily issues and triumphs that you are seeing and working with on a daily basis. All together, these messages make for a powerful look at the positive impact that the Army Corps is making in Afghanistan. The videos show us that our first thoughts and actions should be devoted to the maintenance of the peaceful process of rebuilding this country and that we in time may be able to transmit it in all its integrity and glory back to the Afghanistan people. To be surrounded by hostile Taliban forces but undaunted in your mission, it is because of your grit and grace under the tremendous pressure that this is all possible. I do not doubt whether the coming day will dawn on the people to enjoy the blessings of the liberty that our country wishes for them. In time, I know that the Army Corps will be able to restore their waning confidence and give them reassurance that they can still possess a national government that will sustain itself for many years to come. I hope that the Army Corps is a symbol for the Afghanistan people to continue to fight to preserve their own country. You guys and gals are doing a great job. Hurry home safely. AED-North, you make me proud to be part of the Army Corps team.

If you want to follow them on Facebook, here is their link: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1520222831#!/AEDNorth

Mentors - Part 2

2010-09-26T21:04:00.001-05:00

I have been chewing on what mentoring means to me for the last few days, trying to massage my thoughts into some intelligible form. While I still struggle with validation at times, what I desire from a mentor is different. I want their suggestions on how to handle differing situations, recommended avenues for development, challenging and stretching, sometimes correction and sometimes just a nod and a smile. The one component of apprenticeship I crave the most is the opportunity to observe my mentors performing in their vocation. I enjoy watching these experts doing the things that make them the experts in their field like talking with customers, sharing their ideas in a meeting, hiring, firing, and all the grit of leadership and management that comes in-between. This is absolutely critical for me in learning how to be successful in business. For me, having the opportunity to observe my mentors modeling the various components of whatever vocation they are experienced in, and which I aspire to, is an indispensable component of passing on knowledge.

Role Models, Mentors and Friends

2010-09-12T17:35:00.007-05:00

Every time that I start to feel sorry for myself, I think of all the stuff I have been through, put up with, survived, sacrificed, and accomplished. Whether I like it or not, the choices I have made or stumbled upon have made me who I am today. However, I have had a few good mentors, role models, and friends help guide me through this journey we call “life”!

I must admit that sometimes we do not recognize our true role models, mentors or friends until years later when we have noticed our own personal growth and progress. During my lifetime, I have had numerous role models and mentors. Some have reminded me what was really important in life, some have encouraged me to think and use the power of my voice, and some have dared me to make a difference. Each mentor and role model has taught me more about myself even when I did not want to listen. A role model to me is someone who not only treats me as an equal but also is honest, trusting, and most of all open-minded.

I believe the best roles models and mentors make us see the possibilities within ourselves. In the late 1980s, I had a supervisor, Commander Greg Lotz (USN-Ret.), who inspired me to try to live up to my potential. What he did was pull me aside one day and pointed out to me that I was “way smarter than my current job as a secretary” and that I needed to go to college in order to reach the potential that he thought I was capable of. I did not take his advice right then, but it gave me quite a boost and started me thinking and paying more attention to my career and goals in life. In the 1990s, I had another supervisor, Commander Greg Abbott (USN-Ret.), who also pointed out to me that I was hiding behind mediocre jobs instead of doing what I really wanted in life--helping others. He made me realize that I needed to be an advocate for myself and that I needed to take leadership on the issues that I believed in.

Lately, I have been privileged to have two very valuable role models and mentors named Colonel Tom Magness and Colonel Jeff Ryscavage. Their counsel and friendship have proven valuable to me and I have been influenced by the vitality and passion that they have in their lives and in the lives of others that they have touched. Their valuable insight, compassion, tenacity and humor often convinced me that the light at the end of the tunnel was not a speeding train! When I asked for advice, they always seemed to have time to listen, offered advice, challenged my perspective, and sometimes even redirected my efforts.

I am at that “40-something ponder my life stage” and I have come to the realization that I do not have traditional cookie cutter mentoring relationships. I like to call the above relationships episodes of spontaneous mentoring and role modeling. They have occurred because someone opened a discussion about how I was doing, asked me about my projects, suggested possibilities for handing career issues, and so on. If they had not asked me why I was not in college, told me that I was being mediocre, or not taken interest in my daily life, I do not think I would be as successful as I am today. Their input has had profound positive effects on me and my career and will for many years to come.

I truly believe that in order for a mentoring relationship to move beyond thriving to blooming, that there must be an equal flow of admiration and respect. I have been very fortunate to have had several mentors, role models, and friends that have taken an interest in my success. While the above list is not fully inclusive of all of them, their support and guidance continue to this day. I am eternally grateful to all for sharing their lives and I credit this dramatic turn around in my life to the time and effort of these individuals who mercifully helped me when I needed it. As the old saying goes, ‘when the student is ready, the teacher appears’. They all have appeared the moment I was ready to receive their wisdom.

Why do we celebrate Labor Day?

2010-09-05T13:14:00.006-05:00

Why do we celebrate Labor Day? The true meaning and significance of Labor Day, much like many other holidays, has been largely forgotten by many Americans. I do not pretend to be very knowledgeable about our Labor history or the origins of Labor Day, but I did look it up on the Internet and learn about it this morning. What I found is that Labor Day is more than just a day off or a long weekend. It is a day that is intended for us to honor and recognize the contributions of all working people, both those with jobs and those who are struggling to find them in this current climate where our unemployment rate hovers in the double digits across the country. At a time when so many people are unemployed, Labor Day also reminds me that having a job is a valuable thing.

Observed on the first Monday in September, Labor Day was created by the labor movement during the height of the Industrial Revolution in the late 19th century and became a federal holiday in 1894. Back then, the average American laborer worked 12-hour days and seven-day workweeks in order to survive. Does that mean that Labor Day is a relic, and no longer a meaningful holiday? Labor or being a worker in today’s job market has not become easier, it is just different because the majority of our workers are no longer unionized, blue-collar, or manual laborers. This does not mean that they do not work hard, in fact, these days many workers are working longer hours than ever to adapt to the global economy and ever-changing communications technology. Knowledge workers are perpetually tethered to their Smartphone’s and are always virtually at work.

In this decade, we saw taxpayers bailing out Wall Street while some greedy individuals continued to receive million dollar bonuses for their failures; all the while working families struggled to live paycheck to paycheck. We also saw our U.S. tax policy reward companies for shifting millions of jobs overseas in order to take advantage of workers that labored for mere pennies a day. Countless American workers saw wage cuts, loss of basic health care benefits or lost their jobs altogether while numerous corporations posted record profits. These are clear and compelling examples of corporate greed and reasons why we need to take another look at the true meaning of Labor Day. The examples should also make it clear to everyone that we need to celebrate the social and economic achievements of the American worker while also continuing to fight to help restore our country to the “land of opportunity” our parents and grandparents created for us. I have confidence that the working middle class will survive and will continue to provide the foundation for this country’s greatness. In memory of the true heroes who fought for the rights we all enjoy today, it is our duty to stand up now and to honor all of those who will follow us. That, I believe, is the true meaning of Labor Day.

True Friends

2010-08-21T22:37:00.004-05:00

I enjoy the blessing of email and social networking sites such as Facebook because I am finding it easier to maintain and renew many of my friendships by a virtual means. I am a military brat and I have traveled most of my life moving every few years. Because of this, I have friends in many locations around the globe. I am not sure how true friendships emerge but I do believe that they are a gift from God. Having a true friend requires a certain oneness of mind, purpose, and a nobility of character. Real friendships require both friends to understand the “heart and soul” of the other, and to celebrate what they see, not because they are blinded to each other’s imperfections, but because they see all things through the eyes of friendship and love.

I truly believe that people are in our lives “for a reason, a season, or a lifetime”. Lifetime friendships are the strongest ones and often occur because of shared experiences born out of real opportunities, adventures, and challenges. Often when I look back on a solid friendship, there is a beautiful mystery attached to the origins of it. These friendships were not forced or fabricated, but my life was always the better for them. As we age, our lives undergo many changes and not all of our friendships survive. I have found it normal for a few friendships to fall by the wayside for no obvious reason. Sometimes our priorities shift or we simply grow apart. Friends that are in your life for a “reason or a season” are not any less significant because they are often just as intense and meaningful but only for a shorter time. Like any marriage, relationship, or career, they too require work, thought, and realistic expectations in order to maintain them during periods of ebb and flow.

True friendships leave footprints everywhere in your life, like mud tracked in on a light colored carpet. Nurture your friendships through shared intimacy and reciprocity knowing that they can be rich, life affirming, joyful but also complicated at times. True friends are a unique treasure that wealth cannot buy and power cannot hold. Their transformative power is essential because life is better together – with real friends.

Collaborative Learning

2010-08-08T15:53:00.002-05:00

When institutions of higher learning open up and embrace collaborative learning techniques, they have a chance of surviving and thriving in our networked, global economy. With current technology, it is now possible to embrace some of the new collaboration models that will help facilitate a change in the relationship between students and instructors in the learning process. In the industrial model of student mass production, the instructor is considered the broadcaster. Meaning, the person that is responsible for the transmission of information in a one-way, linear fashion from transmitter (instructor) to receiver (student). For years, broadcast learning has been an appropriate way of gaining new information for a previous economy and generation; however, it is increasingly failing to meet the needs for a new generation of students who are now entering the global knowledge economy. Educators who use varying approaches of collaborative learning often tend to think of themselves less as an expert in transmitting knowledge and information to students, and more as an expert in design of intellectual experiences for students. Collaborative learning techniques allow a structure that creates more student participation and much more learning occurs when this happens. In addition to increased learning, mutual exploration, collective meaning making, and problem solving it creates a better learning outcome and understanding of the material in general.

What are your thoughts on collaborative learning?

Single Canvas Teaching

2010-08-06T19:55:00.001-05:00

Have you heard the phrase, “Death by PowerPoint?” Imagine being able to use a presentation tool based on the idea of a single “canvas” rather than a sequence of multiple slides. This concept allows you to link to and reference work of leading scholars in the field while sharing this presentation online, thus allowing students the ability to explore links that are embedded. As an example, we can place an image of a form or computer screen shot at the center of the working area and label the distinctions about it. Additionally, an instructor will be able to put explanations and web links further out on the canvas. This organizational approach allows the form or computer screen shot to serve as the central point of the presentation and helps clarify how additional information is related to it. This application enables presenters the ability to zoom in or out on each explanation as needed and to follow links to online demonstrations of how to fill out the form or interact with the screen shot. Additionally, the canvas can be divided into different regions and as part of a team teaching concept; each instructor can place their comments, images, videos, and links in their respective areas. This tool can allow a team to develop a smooth and efficient presentation and the nonsequential nature of the tool, results in a richer experience for students by allowing the discussion to guide the presentation in unplanned directions.

Love is a Four-Legged Word

2010-08-01T17:08:00.001-05:00

I have never understood people who say that our four-legged friends do not love. Many people do not think our furry friends have the capacity to love, but I am certainly not one of them. I have lived with dogs and cats for most of my life and I can say without a doubt that these truly amazing creatures have the market cornered on love--and we could all learn a thing or two from them. I have never met a person who can love as completely and without reservation as some of the pets, I have been blessed with in my life. Dogs in particular, are such incredible creatures and you can see the intelligence in their eyes.

It really does not matter what kind of mood I am in, what my hair looks like, what kind of job I have or how much money I make. My furry friends, especially Snoodle, are always there for me. Being a dog – Snoodle has her own way of being there for me. I can tell her my secrets, my fears, my hopes and she will not dismiss them, or talk about me behind my back. She will laugh and play with me when I’m happy--comfort me when I am down--protect me from what she feels are dangers, and she will even let me ramble on for hours if I need to. All the while, she always seems to understand that I love and need her as much as she loves and needs me.

Our animal friends touch the depths of our emotions and beliefs, and in doing so, they change the way we live and fulfill our lives. That is why “love” is a four-legged word for me!

Personality Profiles

2010-07-10T18:53:00.004-05:00

Personality profiles have been around for a long time. Some of the ones you may be familiar with are Meyers-Briggs and StrengthsFinders. There is also another tool called Flippen that the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers has just recently begun using. The Flippen profiling processes is for Leadership Development and this tool enables supervisors and employees to identify personal constraints that hold employees back from moving from “good to great”. Constraints are not a bad thing…we all have them. Once you take the personality profile, you are then coached by one of the Flippen coaches on your personality constraints that you need to work on. This tool is meant to help people understand their constraints and to establish a plan to overcome them.

I am trying to keep an open mind about the Flippen profile but I had a negative experience related to my results in how they have been reinterpreted back to me by a fellow employee. Again, we need to remind ourselves that personality profiles are only a single tool that should be used with other tools when making employment decisions and when evaluating ones personality, strengths, and constraints. These profiles should not be used in such a way as they are seen as the only tool when decisions are made (especially without all the facts). People are not machines and varying personalities are good in the workplace. Understanding how all those personalities fit together can sometimes be challenging but also rewarding.

Being Amerasian in 2010

2010-05-29T20:41:00.001-05:00

I went in to get a pedicure and I left with a history lesson from Mary who is a 42-year-old Amerasian from Vietnam. Mary co-owns a nail shop with her Amerasian sister Vicky. They arrived in America with their Grandmother when Mary was 21 years old. In Vietnam, they were reviled as a bui doi or "dust child," the mixed-race child of an American soldier and a Vietnamese mother. These children were also called half-breeds and were considered tainted because of their skin color and facial features. Mary, her sibling, along with some 23,000 Amerasians and 67,000 of their relatives were able to emigrate to the US due the passing of the Amerasian Homecoming Act that was enacted by the U.S. Congress in 1987.

In April 1975, tens of thousands of people with ties to the US were lifted off in helicopters from the top of the US Embassy in Saigon. The rest of the “children of the dust” were left behind to fend for themselves as they enemy rolled in. Many of them suffered abandonment not only from their fathers, but also from their mothers and extended families. They often were left in orphanages, made to work as field hands, housekeepers, or beggars. The Vietnamese government did not prohibit Amerasians from going to school, however it was a cruel place for a child of mixed race. In school, children jumped Mary, beat, taunted her, and refused to sit next to her.

Mary and Vicky are two of thousands of children of US service members who lead shadow lives, somewhat isolated from American life and the Vietnamese community by a chasm of illiteracy, language barriers, distrust and discrimination. Being of mixed race and with minimal formal education, their assimilation into the American culture was a long and difficult journey, but Mary and Vicky have shown real strength and resiliency by demonstrating economic self-sufficiency. Mary has her own dream about what it means to be an American and seems to long for her homeland that does not miss her.

Mary seems to have a few friends and loyal customers. Her English, although heavily accented, is quite good. She lives with her sister in a home located in Madison County, Alabama. When she is not at work, she is usually at home. She likes it there, but she has faced some discrimination there too. Finding a home in the “land of her Father”, in many ways has been as elusive as it was in Vietnam.

Memorial Day and Service

2010-05-27T19:56:00.003-05:00

There are very few callings more fulfilling than a tour of duty or a career spent in military service. As we approach this Memorial Day weekend, let us honor the fallen by ensuring that our future is worth the sacrifice of their tomorrows. Behind every grave of a fallen soldier is a spouse without a loved one to whom they pledged their undying love, a child who will never again feel the warmth of their parent’s embrace, or a mother and father who have lost the son or daughter they once cradled lovingly in their arms. Such losses are unmatched but can be seen at any of a 100 national cemeteries across the United States where there are military graves.

At Arlington National Cemetery, our nation’s preeminent military cemetery, America’s most recent war dead (Iraq and Afghanistan veterans) are buried in Section 60, also know as the “saddest acre in America”. Arlington also contains the remains of more than 260,000 brave men and women who gave their lives for their country. Others that are laid to rest there also include Presidents and Supreme Court Justices, astronauts and significant historical figures, Medal of Honor recipients and Five Star Officers, along with more than 4,700 unidentified soldiers represented by the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.

Several years back I visited Arlington. What I saw there left a profound sense of emptiness in my soul and has stayed with me and touched me in a way that I will never forget. The cemetery has a peacefulness about it, but as I stood there and viewed the rows and rows of white tombstones stretching towards the horizon, I realized the real cost of war, the real cost of freedom, and the real sacrifices our service men and women make for our country every day. I could not help but feel the loss and the sadness of those families as I stood in such a sacred place that epitomizes the honor of service of our military. Each tombstone gives voice to those who have made the ultimate sacrifice to their country.

I don't know how you plan to spend Memorial Day, but I hope you will take a moment to remember those who have served, suffered, and given their lives in defense of our country.

Safe Travels My Friend

2010-05-22T09:42:00.003-05:00

The speed at which news travels these days never ceases to amaze me. As soon as I logged on to my computer this morning and read the daily news happening around the world, I found myself unable to breathe as I read about the plane crash that happened in India. You see, I knew of a friend who was flying into Dubai and my first concern was of their safety. In that brief moment, the potential loss of their friendship caused me to crumble in a way I have never experienced before. I wanted one more day, one more phone call, and one more email from my friend. I searched the internet frantically for news of the survivors and a list of those that were on the plane. It was two more hours before I learned of those that had perished and those that had survived. It felt like the longest two hours of my life. Even now as I write this blog through tears, the possibility of loosing a friend so suddenly made me realize that life is truly unpredictable and too short. Thankfully, my friend was not on the plane that crashed but countless others lost a loved one today and I feel their pain and suffering.

Armed Forces Day Thoughts

2010-05-15T17:17:00.005-05:00

Throughout our nation's history, many women and men of courage have willingly defended our nation's liberties at freedom's front in any land, sky, or ocean. Sixty years ago, President Harry S. Truman deemed that a day be set aside to honor this tradition by paying homage to those who have served this nation in uniform. Today is Armed Forces Day and all across the nation, thirteen stripes and fifty stars soar high in the sky at many of our homes because the flag represents our banner of freedom and it is our way to show respect to those who have served and continue to serve in the military.

Armed Forces Day was designated to celebrate all the services (Army, Marine Corps, Navy, Coast Guard, and Air Force) standing watch around the globe. It is because of the selfless service, perpetual vigilance, and constant readiness for action from our soldiers that this day inspires many Americans to pause and pay tribute to the men and women in uniform. Our military has played a major role in the development of our country and has brought peace to many other countries because of their unbending honor, their dedication to duty and their love of country.

This new century ahead holds new and great challenges for our county. The fight for freedom around the world is an ongoing battle. Yes, those missions include supporting the Iraqi and Afghanistan people and the Coalition Air Force Transition Team in their battle with insurgents, so that a free and stable government can take hold and survive. Remember, this fight is not just the conflict in Iraq and Afghanistan, it is also a fight to save lives through our humanitarian relief operations, a fight to discourage and deter our adversaries, and it is a fight to provide for the strategic defense of our country now and in the future.

As we set aside this day, please show your support of our Armed Forces as they continue to carry out their assigned missions. This evening in particular, my thoughts and prayers are with the families and friends of the soldiers who have died serving their country honorably. Their bravery and sacrifice deserve our respect and gratitude. Let us also not forget the families of our service members either. They should also be recognized for their contributions, loving support, and sacrifices they endure that ensure that our service members are ready to answer when our Nation calls.

The Power of Positive Thinking

2010-04-25T14:16:00.001-05:00

In previous blogs, I have written that I believe in the power of positive thinking. I know that my thoughts both negative and positive have powerful effects on my life. As a rule, I try to start my day with positive thinking. I try to think about all the blessings in my life, even if it is just for a few minutes. I do this every day in the morning, especially on workdays. You should try it. It may seem weird at first, but with practice, having the ability to have positive thinking will give you a tremendous payout as your day unfolds.

When a person participates in negative thinking, it always leads to inaction and loss of personal power. Having a positive perception and thinking will always lead to action and an increased personal power. Yet, we always seem to choose the negative side by default. I guess we can blame it on our society or on the negative conditioning we may have received during our childhood, but you need to remember that there are always two sides to every situation. The hard part is learning how to separate those two sides called fact and perception.

When faced with a problem, I try to ask myself the right kinds of questions about the situation, because it can often guide my thinking to the positive side. For example, instead of asking yourself “Why does this always happen to me?” whenever something negative happens to you, try asking yourself the following types of questions instead:

• What kinds of things can I learn from this situation?
• How can this situation help me grow as an individual?
• What is the best part about this problem?
• In what ways can I benefit from this situation?

I have always found that asking the right questions enables me to have the power to reframe the situation easily so I can use it to my advantage. If you use this process, you will see that from one small event and the use of positive thinking, you can think of multiple future rewards and gain better perspective when problems arise.

Planting Seeds of Friendship

2010-03-31T11:18:00.002-05:00

It has been a long winter, but finally we are getting glimpses of warmer days and sunny skies. As we put away our sweaters and we bring out our sandals, it is a great time to take few moments to tell those around you how much you appreciate them in your life. Friends make a profound and positive impact on us, our families, our communities, our workplace and in the world. We need each other in our lives in order to grow and learn about ourselves. Surrounding myself with individuals who take the time to give me the guidance and support I need not only encourages me to strive to do better, but it gives me the confidence to succeed in life. Be intentional about where you plant your seeds of friendship. Thoughtful gardening today can blossom into fruitful blessings for many years to come!

Happiness - My Secret

2010-03-28T11:14:00.001-05:00

It was no surprise to me that I received some heat from a few friends concerning my last blog about being a workaholic. While I admit this can be a bad thing for some, it truly is not a problem for me but I must admit I am always working at finding the correct balance for work and happiness. Work is not the only thing that defines me but it is extremely important and it would be silly to think otherwise. However, work does have its place and must fit comfortably in the big plan with my personal self and my family self. I have been told that in order to die happy, one must live a life with that end in mind and they must live a life of purpose in order to be truly happy. However, that is easier said than done.

How do you define happiness? It can mean different things for different people. For me, I know that money cannot buy happiness, but society often acts as if they would be happier with more money in their wallets. We have been conditioned to want to be rich, when we know the wealthy are not any happier either! Our society is always looking for the latest gadget or style that is available, and we desire to earn more money because we feel that only then we will have the “good” life. However, none of this will bring us the true happiness we are all looking for, because no matter how much we earn, no matter how much we have saved away in the bank, no matter how nice our clothing, cars or toys, in actuality, none of it will make us any happier. The sad part is that it could take many of us decades of pursuing fame and fortune before this is ever realized.

So how does one find happiness? Here are my three secrets to happiness and they do not cost a thing. First, having good, supportive friendships or a close and loving relationship with your family helps make us more likely to be happy. We all have the human need to be close and to be intimate with other human beings. Having good, supportive friendships, a strong marriage or close and loving relationships with our family members and friends will make us much more likely to be happy. So make time to spend quality time with your loved ones (virtual friends too), tell them what they really mean to you, listen to them, and develop your relationships. Secondly, do not discount the power of positive thinking. Happy people feel empowered, in control of their lives, and have a more positive outlook on life. I have written in a previous blog that I am an optimist, so I am a huge proponent of positive thinking as the best way to achieve your goals, but it turns out that it can lead to happiness too! Try to make positive thinking a habit. Condition yourself to banish negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. Instead of having an “I can’t” attitude, think, “I can”. I know this may sound too easy and may even sound corny, but it has worked for me every time! Lastly, find something that you are passionate about and immerse yourself in it. Once you find work and leisure that gets you into a good state of flow, it will always lead to happiness. Find a job, volunteer work or anything that you are passionate about and discover selfless service. Go ahead, turn off the television, get outside and do something that truly engages you. I find my greatest enjoyment not when I am passively mindless, but when I am absorbed in a mindful challenge.

I confess - I am a workaholic!

2010-03-07T21:13:00.003-06:00

Over the last few years, my life has changed from a relaxed one to a complex and demanding one filled with lots of commitments and unknowns. My calendar is full of details, most of which have been put on my schedule by someone else or by necessity. When I accepted my job, I discovered that there was too much work for a normal 40-hour workweek, so I often work through lunch, come in early, stay late, and even go in on some weekends. I continually work more and more. The weird part is that I like it and probably would not have it any other way right now. I am intoxicated by work and I was raised to measure success in terms of work. I often define others and myself by what we do for a living and our culture reinforces this perspective. For instance, when you are at a party and you meet someone, usually the first question is “What do you do?” It is as if we cannot discuss the non-work person until we get the work conversation out of the way.

Yes, there are days that I desire to live a less complicated life, free of daily stress, maybe even free of a few responsibilities. However, with the ever-changing technology that helps us multi task, the line between work time and non-work time meld into one and with the use of Blackberries, there is no delineation. These technologies allow us to keep connected to others around us and to stay connected. They are a constant pulse and a reminder of the fact that the world goes on, with or without us. The funny thing is that if we drop off the face of the earth for a few hours, days or even weeks, the truth is that the world barely even notices. Nothing is so important that it cannot exist without us. So why am I a workaholic? You see, I made a conscious choice to complicate my life in this way and I love it because I have found my purpose.

God Bless Our Troops

2010-02-27T00:13:00.003-06:00

If you look at the military forces that we are fighting against, you begin to understand how dedicated and professional our own troops are. Our American forces do not hide in civilian clothes, wave white flags in order to get a little closer, and then commit deadly suicide bombings. Suicide bombing is not part of our military doctrine, nor will it ever be. The Taliban and the insurgents have shown that they do not respect human life. They torture and execute their own people, our fallen heroes, and random civilians. Our military provides food, water and protection for captured enemy combatants. Often, our military medical teams conduct battlefield operations to save the lives of our enemy and their people. While the enemy hides among their civilian population, thus putting their safety at risk, our soldiers are protecting their civilians, and providing medical services to them when they are caught in the middle of friendly fire. We know and understand that there is a profound difference between the use of force for liberation and the use of force for conquest. Iraq and Afghanistan civilians are forced to fight, we volunteer. Our volunteer troops go about their mission because they believe in the freedom and the values that our country stands for. Every day our troops are risking their lives in pursuit of freedom and a safer world for everyone.

Once again, I want to express my appreciation to our dedicated and professional troops that serve our country with integrity and honor. They have held strong to the founding principles of our nation; pursuing liberty, justice, and freedom without regard for their own personal cost. Our troops are the greatest generation who continue to serve as inspiration for us all.

Getting Motivated - Again!

2010-02-20T09:24:00.001-06:00

Have you ever had a time when your organization system went to pieces, and your email inbox had hundreds of messages sitting there, not acted upon? Too often, we are hard on ourselves and feel bad about our lack of progress. We feel guilty that we have missed a couple of phone calls, or that our progress on our workout goals have stalled, or that we slipped up and have eaten some really calorie laden stuff! Well, that has been me lately. About writing my blog, I simply have not taken the time to write and did not know what I really wanted to write about. So last night, I updated my Facebook profile and it finally motivated me to want to write again today.

For me, the key was to step back and look back on what I have already done. Sure, I missed some phone calls, going to the gym, and missed a few weeks from writing, but look at how much I have already done! So, instead of beating myself up, I decided to celebrate my success, no matter how small. Yes, I will always feel a little guilty about what I have not done, but I feel that it is important that we remind ourselves that it is only a temporary setback so that we will see this as only a small bump on a long road. There I go again; my optimistic view on life is creeping back out again!

Spider-Man vs. Superman

2010-02-07T14:34:00.003-06:00

A good friend and mentor, Tom Magness posted another great Leader Business blog (leaderbusiness.blogspot.com) titled "Spider-Senses." After reading his blog, I decided to write about his blog and (with tongue-in cheek) write about his choice of superhero. His favorite superhero is Spider-Man and his blog is about Spider-Man's "Spider-sense." You know, that sixth sense we all have when we know something is not quite right and when we get a gut feeling that we need to listen to. In his blog, he refers to it as a “Spider-sense.” Having a spider-sense is quite a remarkable skill to have and many women have this skill but we call it “woman’s intuition.” The best way I know how to describe this spider sense or intuitive feeling is in physical terms when I feel that I have "butterflies in my stomach," "a lump in my throat," or "a gut feeling."

Every animal has a brain, but the human brain is very unique. It gives us the power to think, plan, speak, imagine, and dream. Our brain performs an incredible number of tasks, all coordinated, controlled and regulated by an organ that is about the size of a small head of cauliflower. Looking very simplistically at understanding the brain, there are two sides. There is the conscious half and the subconscious half. The subconscious side is where that spider sense resides. Our subconscious side of the brain is alerting us to intuitive messages through our senses all the time.

I agree with Tom that having a spider sense is a very valuable sense for leaders to have as long as it is coupled with emotional intelligence. We humans (without superhero powers) are genetically programmed with a lifetime of knowledge that equips us with the ability to make good decisions daily. Having good instincts is about how our past experiences and mental assumptions shape our immediate intellectual decision-making reactions. The key to success is acting on our gut instincts, trusting that part of ourselves that collects the information, the most important information, and making the best decisions.

Unfortunately, for some of us, the spider sense can often come as a whisper instead of a shout. It requires us to develop a more acute sense of listening and acceptance in order to hear it. We all have this built in intuition and personal language, and we need to be listening to the cues we are given. The saying, “go with your gut” is overused, but we sometimes forget that it is right most of the time. Yes, all of us need to learn to trust our spider senses. We all come equipped with this cool super power and we have within ourselves powerful but hidden natural powers that we can develop and use for the “good.” So, try listening to your spider sense more often and see the benefits you will reap.

For the record, I feel that Superman is a far superior choice for a superhero because he possesses extraordinary powers such as superhuman strength, speed, stamina, durability, senses, intelligence, regeneration, longevity, super breath, heat vision, x-ray vision and flight. He is "faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound." Spider-Man can only swing from building to building! Who is your favorite superhero and why?

God Bless America

2010-01-16T16:02:00.006-06:00

Have you recently thought about the thousands of soldiers serving overseas right now? So many families have sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, husbands, wives, mothers, or fathers that have volunteered to serve not once, not twice, not three times, but even four different deployments. These service men and women have served tours of duty in some combination in Iraq and Afghanistan as well as in various other locations throughout the world. They are serving years away from their families, friends and loved ones. Just this week, in the aftermath of the quake that devastated Haiti, America once again rose to the task of being the leader of the free world in contributing humanitarian aid and also by sending American troops. Yes, our soldiers are not just at war, they also serve selflessly aiding many other counties helping them preserve their way of life too.

On the calendar, there are a couple of days where we have the opportunity to remember and pay tribute to the men and women throughout history who have served our great nation. On Memorial Day and Veterans Day, we pause to honor those who gave their lives to defend our freedom. The freedoms and liberties we cherish on these days was paid for with the blood and sacrifice of countless Americans who answered their nation’s call to serve. Do we really need a day on the calendar to realize that we need to think about and thank our veterans for their service—past and present--every day?

I want take this time to express my appreciation to those who continue to serve our country with integrity and honor. You have held strong to the founding principles of our nation – pursuing liberty, justice, and freedom without regard for the cost to your personal lives. You are the greatest generation who continue to voluntarily serve as inspiration for us all. You understand the difference between the use of force for liberation and the use of force for conquest. Today, as our service men and women answer the call to defend our nation and provide freedom and stability to many ailing and troubled regions around the world, we find ourselves with a new generation of American heroes. These young men and women join their predecessors who made the ultimate sacrifice in pursuit of freedom and a safer free world. Please join me in celebrating our heroes today and every day. God bless them and America!

Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr.

2010-01-10T18:54:00.009-06:00

Around the United States and throughout the world, Martin Luther King, Jr.'s birthday is celebrated with marches and countless playbacks of his brilliant "I Have a Dream" speech. King’s words, are as valid today as they were over 30 years ago, and continue to inspire people. President Ronald Reagan signed legislation designating the "Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr.," or MLK Day a federal holiday. King's birthday is on January 15 and this holiday was designated to celebrate and honor his legacy. For some, this holiday is simply a day off from work. However, some have chosen to use this day as a day of community service to the community in which they live. The United States has come a long way since the days before the beginning of the civil rights movement. Despite this, there is always room for improvement and the need to make life better for all Americans. I do not know how you plan to spend MLK Day, but I hope it will be meaningful.

Morality Based Education

2010-01-09T19:19:00.002-06:00

Originally, our educational system was first used to develop the moral citizenry of communities across a developing nation. However, in this century, morality based education has taken a back seat to political correctness. Things like “the greater good” and “pride in doing a good job” seem to have disappeared from the minds of our youth. To be honest, I do not blame our educational system for the entire problem. I blame many parents. I feel that parents should create a strong moral foundation in their children and teach them that they should not lie, cheat, or steal. Unfortunately, many children live with parents that are not equipped to provide a strong foundation of basic morality. Because of this, we are raising a nation of youth that are in the “fast lane” of life, only concerned with themselves. Our youth need to understand that morality and personal ethics is not something they do, but it is a part of who they are.

Life Is Too Short - Enjoy It!

2009-12-31T22:32:00.003-06:00

How do you see life: through the eyes of an optimist, through the eyes of a pessimist, or through the eyes of a realist? This week, I had an epiphany. I finally acknowledged that I was an optimist but I like to be viewed as a realist. Although, sometimes I let pessimism get in the way of achieving my goals because my outlook on things is readjusted to fit the circumstances that life brings my way. You see, we really have characteristics of each in us, but one is more dominant.

Mostly I see the world as a grand opportunity with people, who like me, also are not perfect. I believe in the power of positive thinking and try to see the bright side of most situations. I am perhaps too positive at times, and downright silly, but that is better than being bitter and feeling like life has passed me by. For me, things do work out better this way and I am a much happier person for it. I truly want to see the good in people and situations and often am accused of wearing rose-colored glasses. Being happy really is a choice that has brought me many rewards.

We are only living on this earth for a short while and I have realized, yet again, how short life can be, how perilous our existence really is and how important it is to keep the extraneous garbage at bay. I am excited when I think about the possibilities that 2010 will bring. Life is too short to not enjoy it, so my goal is to savor and enjoy the journey and not to always worry about the destination.

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” - Winston Churchill.

Happy New Year

2009-12-31T19:49:00.001-06:00

I wish for courage and strength for those serving in harms way. Our men and women of our armed forces represent the true heart and soul of America. We are blessed to have soldiers and commanders who are committed to the mission of making a better Iraq and Afghanistan. Wishing for peace on earth and wishing all a Happy New Year.

Immortality and the Soul

2009-12-27T14:58:00.001-06:00

Anyone who believes in God has his or her own reasons for doing so. However, if one does believe in God, then they must believe in immortality because the Bible assures it. A true Christian believes that they will not die—in the spiritual sense that is. The book of Genesis shows that God gave Adam the breath of life and that he “became a living soul”. This means to me that Adam was a soul. Yet, when we die, we turn to dust and return to the ground. What happens to our soul when we are not of the flesh? Human life and the universe do not follow a straight line. If one believes in immortality, then it sounds like life does take the form of a moving circle. Like the universe, the flow of life is in perpetual motion.

Man is a living being and he is comprised of a body, a mind, and a life. These three components are intertwined in order for man to be of the flesh. Perhaps this is why according to the Bible, souls need to be delivered from death because “flesh and blood cannot enter into the Kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians). In order to enter the Kingdom of God, man must be changed from a carnal to a spiritual person. I personally think that the soul resides here on earth or heaven and that life comes from death. I believe that the body is quantitative and that it can dissolve into its parts. However, I believe the soul is not quantitative and it cannot dissolve into parts, or die.

I studied religion in college and found the Buddhist religion to be both interesting and perplexing at the same time. Buddhist believe that our today is most important and if one thinks they will probably be alive tomorrow, then they did not truly live today. They also believe that if you place greater value in the past or count on the future, then it means you did not truly live your life. Buddhist seem to live in the here and now and not for tomorrow like many of us seem to.

Merry Christmas

2009-12-24T13:43:00.001-06:00

Today in our comfortable homes surrounded with plenty on the eve of Christmas, it is well for us to pause and remember with deep appreciation our loved ones both home and abroad. Merry Christmas to all our soldiers and their families. Hurry home safely and wishing you and yours peace in the New Year.

Goal Setting for 2010

2009-12-24T13:21:00.002-06:00

The year 2009 is almost over and a new decade is just a few days away. If your inclination is to look at last years resolutions and just change the date, you are wasting your time. If you do not even bother planning for the New Year, you are begrudging yourself of the chance for creating the life you really want. This is the perfect time for all of us to make achievable resolutions, goals, declarations, intentions, plans, wishes, or whatever you want to call them.

During this time of year, I also like to look back across my life and review all things that I have already accomplished. No matter who you are, we all have accomplished many things for which we should be thankful. Yes, it has been a tough year, but we all have a lot to look forward to despite the economic outlook. What are the most important things to you in your life (family, money, security, or fun)? Do you even know? I am talking about values. Our values guide our life and the decisions and choices we make. Often, life takes a turn and we are not living congruently with our values. Being out of sync with our values creates undo stress in our life. So, go ahead and reevaluate your values before you decide on your new goals for the New Year. An old adage says, “Plan your work, and work your plan.” That is especially appropriate when you are setting goals.

You have everything you need to make your goals happen. You have the answers and wisdom within yourself to know the truth for your own life. We all are in a time of change, so this is a perfect time for you to live your life according to your own values — to create what you want for yourself. Surround yourself with the people you love and who support you no matter what, and you will achieve your goals for 2010! It is possible--start NOW!

Why it is important to study a child's world?

2009-12-19T00:38:00.000-06:00

The reason why it is important to study children and development is so that we can understand how children change as they grow up and understand the forces that contribute to those changes. “The past causes the present, and so the future.” I learned this quote in high school when my history teacher tried to explain to my class why we needed to know U.S. History. The same applies to the history and study of childhood development if we want to make the world better for our children.

According to some educational theorists, the only disadvantages of studying a child’s world occur when developmental scientists arrive at differing conclusions using experiments that are not controlled and replicable. In order to correct this, research needs to be quantitative, qualitative, or both. Scientists need to use random sample selections in order to ensure validity of their research. Additionally, scientists need to be aware and sensitive to the many ethical issues that are involved in research on child development.

The history of early childhood education and development has many facets. The knowledge base includes ideas, content and practice information, and excellent models. The three basic theoretical issues on which developmental scientists differ are the relative importance of heredity and environment, the active or passive character of development, and the existence of stages of development. Childhood is a separate, distinct, unique period in the human lifespan that has intrigued many theorists to explore. Because there are multiple theories on child and adolescent development, no one theory or theorist is unanimously accepted. However, when we understand a child’s world, past and present, we better understand how people and societies act in the present. Research in the study of a child’s world also promotes historical perspective in the making of current educational policy.

What Happens Next?

2009-12-08T18:43:00.000-06:00

Religion is rooted in different societies and cultures and these differences influence how various cultures see death and the afterlife. For some cultures, the afterlife means heaven and hell, while for others; it also includes places like limbo and purgatory. For me, I see our world is a reality of all human beings with their cultural histories and beliefs intertwined. Seen from this viewpoint, religion is a human and mundane actuality. Because of this, I often wonder if the belief in an afterlife is a coping mechanism that allows us to endure our awareness of our eventual death.

I am not a deeply religious person; however, I know that I would be lost without my basic beliefs about God, the Bible, death, and the belief in an afterlife. I feel it is important for societies and cultures to have something in which to believe in and something to which they can focus their faith. Having spiritual faith, which is a fundamental part of religion, in something or someone, gives individuals the will to live, soothes their fears in times of death, nurtures their spirit and gives hope and meaning to their life.

I do believe that basically, all religions teach that if you live a good life, you can earn your way into your God’s good graces. For the western believer, the physical death means the biological cessation of a person’s breath, bodily functions, and heartbeat. The second part of death occurs when the soul and spirit leave the body and pass on to some place else. Generally, for a western believer, that could indicate that you may go to heaven. However, some eastern believers think that it means they will cease being reborn and they will become one with their god.

Various cultures around the world practice their religion differently, but I feel we practice it for the same reasons. I think that most religions lead to the same place and same God and that eternal life does not necessarily mean heaven. Eastern believers believe that the kingdom of God is not heaven where we seek to end our journey after our time on earth, but that it is our world we currently live in because it was designed for us so that we could live our lives to the fullest. I believe eternal life is living without end, and it is about truly living the life you have been given.

Getting Older and Wiser

2009-11-27T22:35:00.001-06:00

Next month, I will be another year older. I remember when I turned ten and I thought that I was a “big” girl that knew everything. Those teen years brought raging hormones, horrible acne and insecurities about my body, some of which I still struggle with today. In my twenties, my body turned from pubescent to womanly and I discovered the laws of gravity. To be honest, I really struggled when I turned thirty because I suddenly realized that I was getting older even if I did not feel old. Turning thirty meant that there was no turning back and hitting the “re-do” button. I told myself that I needed to stop saying, “I wish I could” and start doing what I wanted to do because I finally felt that life was REALLY too short to have regrets. When I turned forty a few years ago, I finally stopped counting the years. Honestly, I really forget now what my true age is without doing the math…and I hate math! I tell myself daily that I am only as old as I feel and I am determined to age gracefully because there really is not any other option. I will not do plastic surgery or have Botox because I am too much of a chicken. I will embrace my fine lines and age spots with an understanding that I have earned all of them. I know I cannot compete with the body of a twenty year old, but can she compare in either the confidence or knowledge that I finally have? I guess there is something worse than having another birthday…not having any more birthdays. Yes, I am getting older and I am going to embrace it because there is no stopping it.

Giving Thanks

2009-11-22T02:40:00.001-06:00

Where did the last month go? I blinked, and the month has gone by so quickly. Now Thanksgiving is upon us this week. For me, Thanksgiving Day has always been a day in which I take a few moments to reflect upon the blessings that I am truly thankful for and that I sometimes take for granted. Therefore, I offer a few things that I am personally grateful for.

• I am truly thankful that my family, pets, and friends are in good health. All my family and friends, whether they are local or distant (Facebook) or even whether I have ever met them in person or not, make life every day more manageable.
• I am thankful that I have a great job. One of the most rewarding things about moving to Huntsville and working for the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers, and the thing for which I am most thankful, is the fascinating people that I have met along the way. Each one has an incredible talent or ability, and by some fantastic event, our paths are able to cross. Equally, I am also thankful for the kindness of strangers, many of which have gone out of their way to make my transition from San Antonio to Huntsville an easy one.
• I am very thankful for the times that I have an abundance of work, but I am equally thankful for the down times when I can engage in some hobbies, travel, and just be a couch potato every once in a while.
• I am thankful that every day brings a continuum of options.
• Lastly, I am thankful for today and tomorrow and for all the individuals, which put their lives on the line to protect us and preserve our freedoms as Americans.

Inspiring Others

2009-11-19T23:18:00.001-06:00

I believe that our purpose is to lead and inspire others to do great things. To inspire, we must both create resonance and move people with a compelling vision. We must embody what we ask of others, and be able to communicate a shared vision in a way that inspires others to act. We should create standards of excellence and then set an example for others to follow because our actions are far more credible than words. We must think more about what is right, than always being right. We should care more about the best idea, than whether or not it is our idea, because when we put others ahead of our own rewards and recognition, this shows our authenticity. We should always be searching for the right thing to do, even if it means disclosing that our last decision was not the best. We should share our failures as well as our successes, because this attracts openness from others and inspires others to follow our lead.

Building a Global Leadership Brand, Technology - CNBC.com

2009-11-17T21:02:00.000-06:00

Building a Global Leadership Brand, Technology - CNBC.com

This is a great episode of Executive Vision about how top executives in technology guide their companies in a world where innovation is a key to their survival.

Judaism and Death

2009-11-16T16:28:00.001-06:00

A year ago, I had to put one of my sick animals down due to a lingering and painful illness. My husband accompanied me to the vet’s office but refused to enter the room or to be present when my beloved animal was given the lethal injection. He kept telling me that he wanted to remember our furry friend as he was and that he did not want to see him lifeless. Personally, I did not understand at the time why, but now I do.

My husband is Jewish and he taught me two profound lessons about death. One is that life and death are distinct. When life is over, it is over and one ought to be returned to the earth as quickly as possible. He believes that the body is only the shell of the full human being that once was. People of the Jewish faith believe that it does not do justice to the deceased to parade the “shell” no matter how dressed up or life-like they appear. The second lesson is that neither a pompous funeral nor fancy designer coffin nor lying in state nor any of the accouterments of status we seek in our lifetime is of ultimate value. Unlike the Egyptians, Jews believe that you cannot take it with you and that death restores that relative perspective.

No matter what, each one of us will die, and just as there is a way to live as a Jew, there is a way to die and be buried as a Jew. There is a spare dignity to Jewish death rituals, and earthiness and a healthy realism about death that are coupled with the honor of the dead. However, more than that, the Jewish way of death contains within its strictures an abiding sensitivity to the living, especially to the survivor, the bereaved, the mourner, and the grief-stricken. I feel that there are two things in particular about Judaism that no other religion offers quite so uniquely. One is the traditional Shabbat; the other is Shiva. Shiva’s seven-day period of mourning is when friends and relatives converge on the bereaved to console, comfort, listen, cry, laugh, retell, or simply sit mute and share the silence and the pain.

I think that the display of honor upon the deceased is central to Jewish mourning rituals. Honor is shown by the people who were related to the dead person through ties of love and of family who come in person to escort and to burry the dead and to comfort the mourners. Jews believe that the ultimate honor one can bestow on the dead is acknowledgement that he or she lived a life interrelated with others and these others care enough to pay tribute in person.

Holiday Consumerism

2009-11-13T23:59:00.000-06:00

Don’t get me wrong, I like Christmas but I prefer to enjoy the fall season and colors for a while before seeing Christmas decorations too early. It seems that every store I go into, early Christmas decorations abound. Every year, stores seem to push their holiday goods earlier and earlier. In some stores, decorations were actually displayed in September. I remember a day when Thanksgiving decor came out right after Halloween, and Christmas decor came out right after Thanksgiving. It is starting to feel like these holidays only represent a huge consumerism push and the real meaning of each holiday is getting lost in the shuffle.

Technology

2009-11-11T11:28:00.001-06:00

Being bombarded with information overload from many sources requires a bit of juggling and demands a lot of our time. Technologies like Twitter, My Space and Facebook allow us the ability to share so much about ourselves and represents a steady pulse of the world around us. Figuring out how each of these technologies fit into our personal lives, can be challenging to some. For me personally, I struggle to balance personal privacy and the need to share on a daily basis. However, I am working on finding a balance for this. How have these technologies helped or hindered your life?

Veterans Day - Thank You

2009-11-11T09:02:00.001-06:00

You do not have to be a genius to understand that our heroes are not just the men and women in uniform but also their families staying behind and leading normal lives in very abnormal situations. I am continually marveled at the willingness and strength of families that put aside their own careers and dreams for their spouses in the military. Without the loving support of a veteran’s family, the service member would not be able to go off to war and support our country. Therefore, in honor of Veterans Day, I want to say “thank you” to all veterans, including family members of a veteran and service members currently serving in all corners of the world.

Problem Solving – A Teachable Skill

2009-11-04T19:32:00.001-06:00

The goal of all instruction is to develop skills, knowledge, and abilities that transfer to tasks that a student can understand. However, we must take care when we teach students "how to think.” We should not teach students "what to think" or "what to do" in every instance because this emphasis is on procedural knowledge and not about problem solving.

Many of today’s textbooks show problem solving as a linear process and present problem solving as a series of steps, which leads to an emphasis on only getting the correct answer. In order to develop good problem solving abilities, students need to experience the frustration and excitement of struggling with and overcoming obstacles while solving a problem. Overcoming these obstacles provides students with the confidence they will need in order to tackle these types of problems that will occur in their journey through life.

Traditional teaching approaches involving rote learning and teacher-centered instruction often do not meet the learning needs of students who may be active learners because instruction is most effective when it is student-centered. When students memorize rules, they may be learning something, but they are not developing a good foundation in a given subject because the student is not seeing how things work or how things are related to each other. The goals of problem solving are to improve the student’s willingness to try problems, provide awareness of strategies, explaining how to approach problems in a systematic way, and demonstrating that problems can be solved in multiple ways.

The best approach to teaching problem solving is to use content related to real-world problem solving experiences because this helps motivate students and sparks their interest in solving real-world problems. By providing this type of framework, educators are able to create opportunities for students to make discoveries that allow them to make concepts more concrete and that will aid them for the rest of their lives.

Patriotism and Love of Country

2009-11-01T17:25:00.000-06:00

As a child, I lived on a military post and every morning at 0700 hours we were awakened to the sound of reveille. At 1700 hours every day, a canon fired signaling the end of the work day. At 2300 hours every evening, we were serenaded by Taps. On post, every house flew an American flag every day. Patriotism and love of country wasn't something we celebrated only on the Fourth of July or on Veteran’s Day. Flying the American flag was and still is a way of life for me and countless others connected to the armed forces.

Inside every house on every post lives the spouse and family members of a soldier. Quite often those soldiers aren't home because they are far away defending our freedom. They are in Bosnia, Korea, Iraq, Afghanistan or any one of a hundred other countries throughout the world where they might be needed, while the military family is left to "hold down the fort".

My mother displays a plaque in her home which says, "Navy wife - toughest job in the Navy." This is an accurate description of all military family members of all branches. I am not just speculating on this, I speak from experience. I am a "military brat" whose father often said, "It is much easier being a soldier than it is being the family member of a soldier."

My heart and my prayers go out to all the people in America and especially to those families that have a soldier who serves in the military. Tell your loved ones that you love and appreciate them every day.

America - One Family

2009-10-29T18:51:00.000-05:00

The fight for freedom in this country has been long, painful and ongoing. As we approach Veterans Day, it is time for all Americans to come together as a single voice in support of our military service men and women along with their family members. As a child of a veteran of the U.S. Navy who fought in the Vietnam conflict, it has always been disheartening for me that the public seldom gives much thought to those who serve to defend our freedom we so take for granted in this country. When American soldiers were brutally killed at the Beirut embassy, their lifeless bodies dragged through the streets of Somalia, and when our men and women were killed in the embassy bombings in Africa, the American people let out a collective gasp at the horror but almost immediately went on living their normal lives as if all was forgotten. Soon, all was forgotten and Americans went on living their normal lives while only immediate military family members, friends of the soldiers and the military community continued to grieve.

The purpose of this letter is to remind all Americans we are all one "family" including our soldiers. In addition to being soldiers, these men and women are our sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, fathers and mothers as well. On September 11, 2001, when foreign terrorists impacted many civilian lives, the American people along with the rest of the world were outraged. I cannot help but wonder why the loss of civilian lives created so much more of an outrage than the loss of the lives of our soldiers who continue to serve and protect this country on a daily basis.